I got an e-mail asking about a respite placement in June for a week, and we said yes. Baby time! When we did respite for Beetle for a week, he was at a similar age. I'm really looking forward to it.
In the meantime, we're a bit on the fence on whether or not to take placement calls. I, as usual, want to just see what happens and say no if it's a placement that's beyond our experience. I feel like we can make it work for a week, especially since I'm off work in June. B is more hesitant, doesn't see why we don't take as many breaks as we can. But for me, the breaks are not fully breaks. Even though I'm not waiting on the phone to ring, I know there are kids that need us. I try to fill up my empty days but I really just want a new case to dive into if we're needed. I've appreciated breaks, but after having one when Cricket left the first time, now another after she left the second time, I'm not hoping to extend this one by our own planning. Now, if we happened to get no calls, great. We have a few more days to decide.
In the meantime, I got to talk to Cricket last week. Rhinoceros bounced upstairs when he heard she was on the phone, and their little conversation was hilarious and of course heartbreaking for me, as I miss hearing them talk together so much. It sounds like she's doing well, and we hope to have a playdate sometime next month.
I reached out to my connections to other past placements as well, hoping for something. I got a response from Pterodactyl's caseworker (or former caseworker now, of course), and two pictures! Oh, it is amazing to look at that little face, now a toddler. To see those same expressions grown up a little. It was the first I had seen of her in a year and a half. Somehow the pictures gave me the connection I longed for and helped me accept that I may never see her in person.