Sunday, September 7, 2014

Phone calls

When Cricket arrived, I was able to find out the caseworker from our agency assigned to her.  I e-mailed the caseworker the Google voice number I'd used with Caterpillar's mom.  She passed it on to Cricket's mom, and I got a call right away.  Oh, the heartbreak.  Every few minutes the conversation breaks into crying on her side.  When she's telling me her daughter is a really good girl.  When she's telling me her daughter likes to play with her baby brother, who isn't in our home.  When she's telling me she loves her kids, she just made a mistake, and she wishes she could change it had she known.  What can you say?

She asked if we would say the Lord's prayer with Cricket each night, and we said we were Christians.  So, now I've been reassuring her that we pray with Cricket, and we are also praying for her.

Cricket is one of three siblings.  Separated into three foster homes.  I can't write about it too much as it's just killing me to think about.  The phone calls have been very reassuring to Cricket's mom, but I'm afraid that by comparison, one of the other foster homes is really worrying her, because she's heard nothing from them or about them.  She said she didn't understand why we couldn't have the baby with us, too.  What can I say?  I said we are licensed for one foster child.  I didn't go into how B and I go back and forth about two foster children and what we can handle.  For a desperate, worried mom, I'm sure our explanation would be meaningless.  I'll just have to repeat that we're licensed for one child, that weak but vague statement, because I've got nothing else I can say to her.

Cricket's mom asked to speak with Cricket, which I hadn't even thought about.  I said I had to check with the caseworker.  Caseworker okayed it, so now Cricket and her mom have talked on the phone once per day.

Have you ever seen a toddler talk on the phone?  Mine are always mostly mystified.  She whispered some answers, but she was not so sure about it all.  I know her mom was getting anxious when she only heard silence.  But today's call was a little better, with Cricket approaching the phone with excitement and speaking a little more clearly.  I've learned she likes to hold the phone herself, when I'd been holding it out to her (with it on speaker phone).

It is so much better to have these calls in the lag time.  We'll see what sort of communication pattern we get into as this week we have a home visit and start visits.

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